You haven't lived until you go out for fine dining in Palm Springs with the elite..They are the elite,just ask them and they will loudly proclaim to to be so..
Here are a a few examples of those very interesting and exclusive evenings...
A new,exclusive restaurant had just opened up and a couple we knew had secured a reservation for a table for six,and asked if we wanted to go...After insisting that Jim and I pay our own freight,we agreed to share in a magical evening..
We had not met the other couple, as they were friends of our hosts..Jim and I arrived late,as I couldn't find the damn restaurant..We entered,it was packed with people..We were told our party was waiting at the bar..I can only assume that our being ten minutes late caused the other two couples to drown their worries about our fate, in a sea of Grey Goose French vodka..I mean they were slurring words drunk..I ordered myself doubles in a vain attempt to try and catch up with them..(JK)..
We were finally seated in a very nice two level dining room at ground level,that ended up being ground zero..I placed my order,as did our dinner companions..I went outside for a smoke..Suddenly,I hear a voice behind me slur a request for a cigarette..It was one of the dinner companions we had just met..I offered him a cigarette and offered my lighter..Just as the cigarette ignited,another type of fire exploded..His partner FLEW out to the courtyard where we stood,screeching at the top of lugs at his partner for smoking..Then, this fine gentleman demanded to know why I gave him a cigarette to start with..Not knowing that he wasn't supposed to smoke,and also feeling no responsibility for the actions of strangers,I shared both of those facts, with balled fists..LOUDLY..Please don't think the party is over dear reader,it has just begun..
Staggering before me,my two dinner companions reentered the dining room and returned to our table..I noticed that our other two friends were now missing from the table..I asked Jim where they were..Jim pointed silently downward..No..Get serious..REALLY!!?? They were under the table??? Well, actually, one was under the table lying on the floor,and the other one was now slumped half under the table..Then dinner arrived..
The guy on the floor was now moaning that he had to pee,and remained prone on the floor,dragging himself toward what I assumed was the hallway to the bathroom..I watched as his friends ignored him and a busboy stepped over him..I look at my now cooling $35.00 entree and back at the crawling figure..I stood up, went over and picked him off, leading him down a very dark hall to the mens room..I actually received applause from other diners,which deepened my embarrassment..
I saw a sign on a door that had a sign starting with a large "M" letter..It was so damn dark and he was starting to slip from my grasp,I just yanked the "M" door open and pushed him into that room..within a few seconds the door crashes open..There stood the manager yelling about how the guy tried to pee in his office..Oppppps! Wrong "M"..
The manager pointed me in the direction of the real mens room,which, of course,included another trip through the packed dinning room..This time, we received shouts of laughter..
I found the real mens room, had walked him to the first urinal..He fumbled and fumbled as I held him up against the wall..He asked me for help..I told him that it was likely he would be pissing his own pants before that ever happens..
Luckily for him,he was finally successful and the mission was accomplished..I helped him back to our table, and sat down in front of my cold,congealed,lobster casserole.. By then, Jim had finished his dinner,and our two friends had left the restaurant,their part of the check unpaid,and sticking us with their two pals...I collected enough from our new friends to cover their dinners and the other two dinners,plus a good tip..I stuck the cash in my wallet and paid for the whole thing on my credit card...
Jim and I left those two sitting at the table,and whom might still be sitting there,for all we know..
Next we have another very special Palm Springs dining experience.. As we were the hosts,I must take a little blame for what happened..
A couple we knew were having their 25th anniversary..That same date,there was a going to be a dinner show at one of Palm Springs finest resorts,for charity..The tickets included dinner and a show..It turned out that we ended up being the show..I paid extra to be right in front of the stage..We invited another couple and two single friends as well..Lets say it wasn't cheap, but how many can say its been 25 years together..
I really wasn't paying attention to how much booze the couple of honor was pounding down, but Jim noticed at the time,and I noticed when I got the bar bill..
Food service was completed and the live show was about a third of the way into their program..I told Jim I was glad that we had front row seats..I regretted saying that a few minutes later as the lovebirds got into a drunken fight..Oh yes,screaming things like :" I HATE YOU AND ALWAYS HAVE"..or my personal favDIEEEEEEEEEE"....That was nice!
It was so disruptive that the entertainers stopped entertaining and stood and watched the spectacle right there before them..
One of the two stormed off,civility returned,as did the performance..I bet you think that is all there was to that story..Nahhh..This is Palm Springs,that demands a BIG finale!
I guess about 10/15 minutes later the guy that stormed off returned to our table,shirt torn, and bloody..He said that he had backed into someone else's car in the parking lot and there was a fight when that driver tried to take our drunk friends car keys from him.. Of course,the cops were now on the way..Jim wordlessly bounds to his feet,grabs the poor drunk and says that he, Jim, is driving him home right now, and off they flew..Of course,being me, all I can think of Jim being arrested as a accessory..
Jim returned safe to the resort..Got me, and we bid yet another magical evening in Palm Springs a fond good night.
Don't worry gentle reader,there are many more coming...
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