After a very long search,I found our next house..It was a Palm Springs Modern-style house..Broad overhangs,flat roof,three bedroom and two bathrooms..It was on a quarter of a acre,and had a very large swimming pool..
I made an offer that was instantly accepted by the Seller..That should have been a clue,I took it as luck,silly me..
I contacted the contractor we had previously used in our last remodel,to work for us again, on this house..Little did I know that it would be a year and a half before this house would be completed..
The first thing I did was have our landscaper remove the entire front yard..It was a jungle of half-dead plants,the irrigation didn't work,it was a serious mess..There was a flowerbed to the right of our driveway,that was watered by our irrigation system..I told the landscaper to take out those diseased plantings,as well..A hour or so later,my landscaper comes to me and say that I have a problem and to come and see..And here is where it started..
There was a woman in her 30's screaming at my landscapers helpers to stop removing the plants next to my driveway..I tell her to stop ordering my employees around and to calm down..I told her that they were my plants,that they were on my property,that the irrigation watering those plantings were mine,and I could do what ever I wanted with my property..This creature told me that her grandfather had built her house and that he had planted those plants..I told her I had no idea why gramps would plant things on my property,and told my landscaper to finish ripping out the remaining plants..SCREAMING,the woman flew into her house..10 minutes of so,here arrive the police..The police talk to her,then to me...The police agree that the plants in question are on my property,but to be a good neighbor,that I should let the plants remain..Upon hearing that,I take up a shovel myself and dig at the plants,saying:" Good day,gentlemen" to the police..
And that started the war..
Soon after we moved in,the neighbor across the street gave us the low-down on that lovely and charming creature next door to us..It seem's that yes,her grandfather did build that house..That at some point,his granddaughter,the same woman who was a screaming banshee,had some hard luck and so moved in grandfather with her three boys,and her boyfriend...
After several months, I was told,the granddaughter called the police and reported that gramps had molested one of her sons..Gramps was arrested and was not allowed back in his own house..In fact,he died before anything could go to trial,and that gramps son was suing to get his daughter and her brood out of that house..Nice,huh?
So,the swimming pool plasterers arrive and redo our pool..It wasn't until a month or so after it was re-plastered that I noticed rust scattered all over the bottom of the pool..Each mark of rust was U shaped...It took me a little while to figured what they were..It seems while our plaster was wet,someone threw handfuls and handfuls of metal staples,the kind used by builders.into our freshly plastered pool, ruining it..
Now where could those staples have come from? Since the pool was close to the woman in question's house,it
was clear that they were tossed into our pool...I guessed that showed us, huh? Well, I just left things as they were,and stayed focused at the job at hand,remodeling our house..
Now, lets talk about the house,itself..It was built in 1958,it was the first house built in that South Palm Desert tract..It had a rather simple floorplan..There was also a den off of the living room..I asked our contractor to remove this wall,to enlarge the living room..Which he did...
As I had mentioned,the remodel ended up taking many,many months to complete..The police were over at the banshee womans house every day,or so it seemed..You could hear the constant screaming from there day and night..Why,if Heterosexuals hate each other so much, why don't they separate?...I never get a straight,get it? straight answer about this..It is as strange to me as the habit I have observed of Heterosexuals hanging out in the garage with their friends,drinking beer,all of the time..
Well, that was the situation on the right side of our house..The house on the left side was no prize either..
It turned out to be a rental house,rented to a woman and her 30-something daughter..They had a hobby..That had cats,lots of cats..We counted 14 cats and that was just the ones wondering around..Me? I could care less that they keep an abundance of cats..Except when the cats invaded our property,using my landscaping as their toilet..Then we have the cats screeching day and night while in heat.,.That was real nice!..I finally had enough and called animal control...Animal control gave me a cat trap to use,and to call them when I caught a cat..That turned into a joke,as they cats that were caught,were released back to this same woman by animal control the day after they were caught..
So,one day,the doorbell rings and it is this cat-woman at my doorstep..I close the door and step outside..She informs me that she isn't anti-Gay...I could care less if she was or had a Gay bar in her house..I simply want to be left alone,I inform her..She then inquires if I am wearing a butt-plug...That she understood all Gays wear such things..What is it with Heterosexuals making everything about sex? Is it because they get so little of it? I have no idea..I tell her to leave my property and that she is trespassing..With that she flies into a foaming,screaming rage..Having seen female foaming,screaming rages many times before,I remain unimpressed,or distressed..I walked toward my house and left her in the street,screaming...
The next day,my doorbell rings..It is a policeman..He informs me that my neighbor made a complaint that I was video taping her 30-something daughter over the fence,changing her clothes..I told the officer that we had no video camera (I have one now),and secondly,we were two GAY males,and hardly predisposed to watching women dress or undress..I would rather watch paint dry..He acted like he didn't believe me,and warned me that I better not video record a female..Gawd! How stupid can Heterosexuals be?? Wait! Don't answer that or they will introduce the subject of sex into THAT topic,as well..It is so damned weird...
Now,back to the screaming banshee house..I go out to put out our trash cans for pick-up,and the motion-sensing floodlights for the driveway don't come on..I looked at the fixture and found that someone had unscrewed and removed both floods..Well, of course I knew it had to be the bastards next door..As soon as it was light enough to see,I took my tools and moved the wires in the metal light fixture to touch the metal housing..Thus,when the floods came on, the fixture was *HOT*...Anyone touching it will get a real surprise...Funny thing,it was left untouched from then on...
As soon as the remodel was finished,we listed the house for sale,and ended up buying a new house in a new development,in Indio..
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